Mullets, North Fork and Ugly Faces

Tonight, I am taking my mom to see Richard Marx as an early birthday present. I am pretty sure this concert is going to rock, and I'm not even being sarcastic. Despite Mr. Marx being an aritst of the '80s, known better for his gigantor mullet than anything else, he is actually still a viable artist. He's written/produced about a zillion songs (I counted) for other artists, most recently winning a Grammy for co-writing "Dance With My Father" with the late Luther Vandross. Mom and I went to see him last year at a WPLJ "listeners only" concert (I won a contest) and she even got to meet him beforehand (she won a contest). His new material is pretty similar to his old material - strong rock/pop stuff - and I was surprised how much I enjoyed his performance. So I'm looking forward to it.

Tonight's concert is at the North Fork Theatre at Westbury, which will always be known to me as Westbury Music Fair. Westbury Music Fair is where I saw my very first concert, in 1985. Air Supply, baby! (If anybody can somehow use the powers of the Internet to find the exact date, I'll give you a candy bar.) I went with my mom and my babysitter. At one point, lead singer Russell Hitchcock left the revolving stage and walked into the audience to shake hands with various concertgoers. I extended my hand towards him. He shook the hand of the chick in front of me and walked back to the stage. I was a grumpus the rest of the night, but I knew then that very few musical experiences would ever compare with seeing a live concert. After that came The Monkees, Hall & Oates and a host of other embarrassments. But enough about that. (Really. You don't want to know the acts I've seen.)

So I was looking over the website for Westbury Music Fair North Fork Theatre to see what time Richard was going to start a-rocking. Naturally, I came across their entire schedule. You have to check this out for yourself. There are a million comments to be made, but I'll just note a few.

First off, note how many words are in the name of each act. More words means that you really shouldn't be spending your money to go see them.

Judy Collins and Peter Yarrow of Peter, Paul & Mary with Bethany Yarrow and Kenny White

Bethany is...his wife? Sister? Dalmatian?

The Doobie Brothers

If Michael ain't there, neither am I.

An Evening with LYLE LOVETT and his LARGE BAND

I've only heard a few of his songs, but I bet this would be a pretty good show. Same with Chris Isaak.

Don Rickles, The Smothers Brothers

Did I ever tell you about the time I met Don Rickles? He was walking with a handler after shooting something on the street outside Letterman's theater, and I was so surprised to see him that I just shouted, "Don Rickles!" He stopped in his tracks, gave me the stinkeye, and continued moving. Good times.

Davy Jones , Chuck Negron , Gary Puckett , The Ides of March featuring Jim Peterik

Davy Jones is, of course, a Monkee without a career. (I hear he's an absolute bitch on tour.) Chuck Negron is "the voice of Three Dog Night," and I only know this because he travels in a van that says, on the side, "CHUCK NEGRON: THE VOICE OF THREE DOG NIGHT." I believe there's a booking number on the van too. Poor Gary Puckett (without The Union Gap to boot!), and I have no idea who that last act is.

ROCK NEVER STOPS: Cinderella , Ratt , Quiet Riot , Firehouse

Z, it's a shame I already bought your birthday present.

George Thorogood & The Destroyers

Z, it's a shame I already bought your birthday present.

Huey Lewis & the News

Z, it's a shame I already bought your birthday present. I actually almost bought you tickets last year. I think they were playing the Bowery Ballroom - a much cooler venue than Westbury Music Fair North Fork Theatre.

Hootie & the Blowfish

Oh, how the mighty have fallen. From Madison Square Garden to Westbury in just a few short years. Poor Hootie and the Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch.

Okay, one more listing and I'm done. I just love the way this one is laid out:

9/24/05

Pat Cooper, Joni James: We Remember Yesterday!

Cancelled

If you have any comments about some of the great acts playing at Westbury Music FairNorth Fork Theatre, or memories of any acts you might have seen there (what? It's just me?), post 'em in the comments.

Final note for today, and unrelated to Westbury Music FairNorth Fork Theatre: John Mayer has put together a trio, called (amazingly enough) The John Mayer Trio. Note the following from their bio:

This new venture is a testament to the tremendous respect Mayer has for his fans, as he continues to provide them with new musical permutations in the knowledge that they’ll willingly go wherever he chooses to take them. These fans understand that Mayer is a restless spirit with an ongoing need to test the limits; indeed, that restlessness is the essence of his appeal - it defines who he is and the path he’s traveling.

Translation: Attention screaming girls! This is John Mayer's record company speaking! We do not - repeat - DO NOT - endorse John Mayer doing any project that involves any musical creativity, and especially do not endorse a project like this that includes two ugly guys and definitely precludes any chance of a video on MTV. However, we need to kiss your ass in order to get you to stay with John until we effectively force him (perhaps even physically) to return to his previous cute-boy persona. Please, please, PLEASE follow our 'restless spirit.' Thank you. In the meantime, may we interest you in some Jason Mraz, who finally took off his fucking hat, after we threatened to drop him from the label and force him to play Westbury Music Fair North Fork Theatre?

I actually really like John Mayer. I think he's one of the more intelligent musicians out there today, and I have a lot of respect for his career choices. And he also makes some really ugly guitar faces.

Endnote: Air Supply are playing Westbury Music Fair North Fork Theatre in August. I thought about getting Mom tickets, but I'll be out of town and I don't think she'll be able to find anybody else as lame as me to accompany her. To be honest, I don't think even she'd want to go.

Endnote #2: I just found this link for Hair Supply. My god, these guys are awesome!! Download their cover of "Lost In Love" here. Do it now. Seriously.



Richard Marx 9/8/04, China Club, NYC, taken by yours truly